Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Why I Don't Take My Wedding Ring Off - EVER

"Baby I never knew so much love could fit in a little band of gold, but I'm telling you Darling, I feel it in my heart, got it in my soul..." -The Platters

Some of you know this, but I have NEVER had my wedding band off my finger since October 24th, 2009 (our wedding day). And I just WILL NOT take it off. In fact, I had some minor surgery yesterday and of course they tell you to remove all jewelry. I REFUSED to take off my wedding band. Everything else (engagement ring, UNC class ring, etc) I left at home, but I was NOT going to take off my wedding band. The nurses acted really annoyed by my refusal, and insisted I sign a waiver showing that I know the risks of having metal on my body during surgery (and thus will not hold anyone other than myself responsible). The risks include the fact that your fingers may swell and thus they would have to cut the ring off, that the ring may carry bacteria into the sterile ER, and that any metal on your body during abdominal surgery (which is what I was having) could ignite from sparks from the cauterization machine and thus cause burns. When we got engaged and were picking out wedding bands, I INTENTIONALLY picked a simple white gold band with no diamonds JUST so I'd never have to take it off to get the diamond prongs checked. So I know a lot of you are wondering - why am I so militant about not taking it off? Why would I risk (albeit a small risk) getting burned during surgery just to keep a simple little gold band on my hand? Virtually every married woman I know takes theirs off from time to time for various reasons, and I CERTAINLY don't think that is bad on their behalf. It's just a personal decision for me. I guess I got it from my mother - she didn't take hers off for 35 years, until it had to be cut off because an allergic reaction causes extreme swelling of her hands.

Let me explain further - I don't take my wedding band off because it's a part of me. Really. That is my symbol of my undying love and commitment to David. And especially during times when he can't stand right next to me, such as in an operating room, I at least want the physical symbol of our covenant to be on me. I mean, my nose is a part of me, and I'm sure it would be much easier for an anesthesiologist to put a feeding tube down your throat if there wasn't a nose sticking out from your face. BUT, have you ever heard of anyone taking their nose off before surgery? Okay, maybe that's a silly example, but the point is my wedding ring, as my symbol of my commitment to David, is every bit as important to be as any part of my body. I realize that taking it off would not make me "less married," and I realize that if I ever needed to take it off for a medical procedure OR if I ever wanted to take it off because of washing dishes, gardening, or some other messy task, David would totally understand. But, as a personal decision about how I like the world to see my commitment to my marriage, taking it off just would not work for me.

So, to make a long story short, to some degree I am just very sentimental. But on the other hand, I can't seem to make myself take off the symbol of the most important earthly relationship I have.

Despite the nurses fussing yesterday, eventually they agreed to let me keep my ring on and put some surgical tape over it for extra security. And as the anesthesiologist put me under, I had the assurance of knowing my ring from my best friend and the love of my life was securely on my finger. :)